#SchumanShow A witches’ sabbath, or just another day in Brussels? Watch an enchanting scene from our latest Schuman Show, where some high-profile Eurocrats come together, don their cloaks, and huddle around a cauldron. But the real spellbinding moment? When this satirical séance transforms into a parody of Shania Twain’s iconic hit “Man, I Feel Like a Woman”!

In this hilarious sketch, three "witches" (i.e. EU Commissioners Ursula von der Leyen, Henna Virkkunen, and Dubravka Šuica) gather around a bubbling cauldron to summon a demon who might just save them from the challenges of the upcoming EU Commission mandate. One main challenge? Not enough women, since member states weren't able to send women candidates for gender parity...

It’s equal parts cauldron-stirring cackles and catchy musical satire as the Commissioners tackle quotas, portfolios, and EU politics with flair -- and female empowerment. Watch now!

✨ Written and performed by Louise Day, Kelly Agathos, Hille Auvinen, and Barry McKeon, along with Paul Dallison, Daniel Mora, and Meyas Al Mansour. Director Gabriel Soler. Theatre coach & Choreographer Edward McMillan.

-- LYRICS:

C’mon The future’s not too bright, but the centre-right Had a plan to get us out

A simple demand: a woman and a man They said no I have no doubt!

New politicians, old coalitions Tripping over those red lines

We are the ones You didn’t elect Some for the second time…

The best thing about being a woman The quotas have you on the list at number one and

Oh oh oh guess most members states yeah Could “not find a lady” They sent men first

Oh oh oh, nothing to see here, been like this for a while Oh oh oh,..get good positions, you lead the Commission Hey Costa I swear, don’t sit on my chair

Ooh ooh ooh Can they not imagine more women just like me? Man, they wouldn’t send a woman (hey!)

So what it didn’t take- don’t let em see you break I’m gonna make you EVPs Question for you, Dubravka is term two Ursula what about me?

The best thing about being Dubravka You’ll get a title that noone understands and Oh oh oh - my jobs a bit hazy, 'the Mediterranean'?

Wine, sun, sea beach Oh oh oh my darling it’s hard

Well have you seen all my files? Oh oh oh network selection, minor protection

Hey Thierry I guess, I’ll deal with your mess Oh oh oh go sit on some boards while I get the real work done,

Man, I feel like a woman Uh huh Oh yeah

It’s not really just being a woman It also helps if you are rich, white and not young - young young

Oh oh oh this isn’t diverse yeah, but we ran out of verses To make that point

Oh oh oh we’re tryin’ our best but it’s still an EU deal Oh oh oh We’re women of action, with bureaucrat passion

It isn’t fair, we don’t get our share Oh oh oh why’s it so hard yeah to reconcile ideals (Rotten deal)

Man, at least I’m a woman Hey! Oh oh yeah yeah More of the same yeah Can’t we change it? Come come come on ladies...

--

Thank you for your support!

Co-funded by the European Union. Views and opinions expressed are however those of the author(s) only and do not necessarily reflect those of the European Union or the European Commission. Neither the European Union nor the European Commission can be held responsible for them.